Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Becca Powers: Welcome to another episode of The Empowered Half Hour, and you've heard me bring on some of my friends from Brand Builders Group and I'm here with another friend from Brand Builders Group. today I am gonna bring to you Chris Jansen, who is a life coach and bestselling author. She's releasing her second book, grace Yourself.
And by the time you hear this. It will be out, so you can go support her with a purchase if you like Today's, message, but for me, I get to sit with her a week before it comes out and she's aiming to go to, the USA today bestseller. So maybe by the time you guys listen to this. She'll have the USA Today bestseller in front of that book.
but welcome to the show,
Chris Janssen: Chris. Thank you, Becca. Yes, and congrats on you being a USA Today bestseller. It's just in, it's inspiring to me.
Becca Powers: Yes, it is. And it's an inspiring journey. we're gonna get into talking about your book in a second, but just for the listeners, I know probably in your world too, I get so many people, like, how did you become a bestselling author?
I've always wanted to write a book and, the journey starts with, for me, the journey just started with writing and trying to get my thoughts. Together. So before we go into your specific story, if someone's listening is hearing us talk and be like, oh, congratulations for being USA today and pre-con congratulations for tracking towards it.
what would you say to an inspiring writer that is listening to this?
Chris Janssen: Yeah. Way to go. Great job. And write to that one person or have in mind who you're writing to and don't think about bestseller lists. Don't think about, any of that yet. don't even think about editing yet.
just get everything out on paper and really be one with your message and that message. There are people who need that message. If it was put on your heart to write it. There's a huge audience.whatever there is a audience I should say that needs that message. So write to those people and they will come.
Becca Powers: I love that so much. And I'm just gonna, um, spring off that for a second for any listeners who do have the writer bug. I love that message so much because I know you're on your second book. I just released my second book. My first book was self-published. I wrote for that one person. I, had a, story and a framework I wanted to share, I felt was really important.
I self-published my first book. I had no idea what I was getting into, and 18 months into it, post releasing it, I had 3000 readers or something. And I'm like, holy cow. I was too green to know, the industry or to have any intention other than putting it out, but I had a lot of passion behind it.
And, I think that's what kept me writing. And did it keep you writing and wanting to produce your second book?
Chris Janssen: Yes. My story's so similar. Self-published the first one, and then I've always loved writing since I was little, but really got the writing bugged to continue with these self. I think as a little girl I thought I could grow up and be a, novelist or, write fiction and.
That didn't happen. But yes, since I'm a coach, the self-help comes out quite
Becca Powers: organically. Same what I like. I, I love story writing too. I've been writing, it's so weird to meet somebody who has a similar track, but I've been writing since I was a kid. like song lyrics, poems, short stories,
Whatever. writing wanted to come out. I just wrote it down. Right. And I always thought too, that I would be more of a fiction writer or something. Mm-hmm. But then like as a coach and a personal development geek on for myself, That's what comes out of me. Yes. Is like, oh, there's a self-help book.
Chris Janssen: Yes. I have binders full of. song lyrics since I was very young.
Becca Powers: Yeah. That's awesome. Yeah, it's funny, prior to starting our, on air, we were talking about being coaches and some of that, Experience leading up to where we are now. And I remember being in my certification process, but it was also by a person, Nancy, I got certified through Nancy Levin who is a Hay House author, and I remember her speaking to the writers in, the program saying, you know how you're a writer, you have journals and journals.
Of writing, of song lyrics, poems, whatever it is. And then I like turned around and I was like, yep, I writer. but let's, shift gears. Let's stay on the topic of writing, but I'd love to ask you to share the background with myself and the listeners of Grace Yourself. Like, first of all, I love that name and I feel like I know what you're meaning when you say that, but I wanna hear more.
What's the backstory to Grace yourself?
Chris Janssen: So the subtitle's important too, and I'll, start by saying this. The first book is called Living All In How to Show Up for the Life You Want. So I titled the second one, grace Yourself, how to Show Up For The Sober Life You Want. Mm-hmm. And the reason those are my subtitles is because the coaching tools in the books and in my coaching are really about showing up for life when we don't know how to, when it's hard, when we don't want to.
and as a coach, I'm always asking, what do you want? so, it's showing up for the life you want. And a lot of people, we know it's a good idea to show up when we don't want to, or think positive thoughts or these things that we hear. Yes. And at the same time, how do we do that?
So that's where my coaching tools come in. The second book was born because the first one had a chapter in it about patterns and addictions habits. and I thought that chapter needed a lot more. So it, the second book just is
Becca Powers: like the spring from that.
Chris Janssen: Exactly. And so in order to share the tools around.
Patterns, habits, addictions, these things. I went ahead and shared my own story with alcohol addiction. So I've been in recovery since 2007, and so I was 37 years old. Thank, thank you. I was 37 when I got sober, and my sober community knows that story, but it's not a story that.
I wasn't ashamed of it. I just don't talk about it like some of my family members and best friends now that this book is out and a lot of them have had a chance to read it ahead of time are going, I had no idea. I didn't know any of this. And so it's vulnerable and a little bit embarrassing. I think I'm over the embarrassing part now, but
like I said,I wrote to who I thought needed to hear it, and I didn't worry about what people would think. And now that it's out, it's been a great way to, you know, here's my story of this trap I was in and this struggle, and here's how you can apply these tools that I'm sharing. To any stronghold you have.
It doesn't have to be an addiction. It doesn't have to be alcohol, it doesn't have to be. I talk a lot to the people who I coach, which is high achievers and recovering perfectionists, and we, do struggle with Those controlling thoughts. We're trying to control our state. I was gonna say,
Becca Powers: control is such a big aspect of what goes on in a high performer's life, and it's really Yeah.
Um, in some aspects the control helps them succeed, but also it's totally an ism that comes from mm-hmm. Chaos.
most of us who are control freaks, a personalities, myself included. I come from a family of addiction. even though I would say my parents were highly functional and they were hippies.
They were musicians. Like uhhuh, sex, drugs, rock and roll. Right. Like it was a part of their persona. But, but in that same. Breath for me. I mean, it was a little chaotic. There was always music and people in it that was also beautiful. Like I got to see people express their natural talents and gifts and there was a real beauty.
That's why my book's A Return To Radiance, because I feel like my parents gave me a gift by seeing them in their Radiance, but then also there is the partying side of it, that as a young child, I'm like walking over people at 7:00 AM in the morning. cause they're passed out. I don't know who that is.
Like, you know, like it's one of their band mates that they've just met. I'm like, oh wow. Yeah. You my parents were musicians for a good part of their life. So I just say that because, I know whether you are struggling with addiction or you grow up in chaos.
Mm-hmm. Right? That if you're not the addict yourself, there is effect that's left over from being in that environment.
Chris Janssen: Right. and then wanting, especially as a, a young girl to control. Our state. Yes. Because when so much is outside of our control, we, could learn to control what we can.
And a lot of people that fall into a harmful addiction. We didn't mean to, I didn't set out to go, Hey, I think all become an alcoholic. Nobody does. Right. I went
Becca Powers: to workaholic like so. Yeah, as an is and something else, that some people reward and clap for as a high performer, it was like, oh, she works a lot.
She's
Chris Janssen: excelling. Right.
Becca Powers: Finding, I was
Chris Janssen: finding herself on the inside. Yes, that's right. Because you're finding a soother To soothe this, and it becomes a ritualistic soother, which can turn into a harmful addiction before we know it. So the Grace Yourself title is really about, to me, grace is God's grace in its unmerited favor.
And as a young woman, as a young child, even I didn't understand grace because I thought I needed to control everything I earned. And so I didn't understand getting something this worthiness. That I didn't have, I didn't earn and I didn't have control over. Yeah. It was like, I'll tell you what I'm worth.
And so once I was in recovery, that was explained to me and I was able to understand that I don't get to control my value and my worth no matter what, even if I want to. And so that's where the Grace Yourself title. Came from. I mean, just you
Becca Powers: talking about that. I don't know if you can tell that my eyes.
I'm still, I'm on cold medicine. I've had been sick, so like sometimes they're getting flipped inside my brain. my eyes were tearing up as you were saying that because grace to me has just become such a beautiful word and not a word, but the feeling that once you start to embody Grace provides, I feel like.
Grace is digging to guilt, right? Mm-hmm. And being a high performer, really been one who is motivated by guilt, I'm a mom too and I'm wiser now and have gone through my cleaning out of things, and I would say that I am on the side of grace now, but what a beautiful gift to give a reader.
Because I don't feel, to your point, that grace is something that is often taught unless it's in a religious context.
But Grace is something that, yes, you can use it in the religious context as well, but Grace is available to everybody.
Chris Janssen: Yes.
Becca Powers: And so Grace yourself, for an example, I'll share something personal.
10 months ago, a little over 10 months ago, my. Brother, struggled with addiction. Like again, you kind of know our background now. Struggl struggled with alcoholism and then, had gotten sober and at a random event had a seizure in a pool and drowned. And died. Oh, back two months ago. I'm so sorry.
No, thank you. Wow. And so, but it brings up this conversation. Life is complex. I think at first I started, you as a sister and stuff, I'm the oldest sister and, there's just the two of us. And so, guilt was one of the first emotions that came up for me.
besides the sadness and the grieving, but was like, is there anything I could have done more? like that narrative started going and then I was just like. being wiser and on the other side and being a coach, I was like, no, it's not even about a right or wrong narrative.
That's not a supportive narrative.
Chris Janssen: Mm-hmm. I just
Becca Powers: lost my brother. I need to give myself grace. Mm-hmm. Like, I didn't know this was coming and this is why I wanted to kind of like. Expand on this topic a little bit and give you some more color so you can respond to and share with the listeners some of your thoughts.
But it would've been very easy, even though there's nothing I could have done But I could have gone down the path of guilt.
Chris Janssen: Mm-hmm.
Becca Powers: And I caught myself and said, you know what? If I gave myself the path of grace mm-hmm. And it shifted. The experience because it'll be something I'm grieving the, the rest of my life.
Mm-hmm. but in this state of grace. I can remember what I'm grateful for. II'm not remembering the bad as much. as I am the good, it's able to keep me moving forward where I could possibly get stuck. So I know that's a very personal example, but, I'd like to turn it back over to you and kind of say like, what empowering message from that could you share with the listeners about your work, about the book
Chris Janssen: and,
Becca Powers: over
Chris Janssen: to you.
Well, thank you for sharing that. I'm sorry. that's rough. It's painful and pain's natural. Being stuck in pain is not natural. And what a beautiful example you just gave, like that dead stop right there. Right? That you changed the narrative. And you are grieving in such a beautiful way.
Chris Janssen: Yes. I call it my beautiful sadness. It is a beautiful sadness because that's human You're not staying stuck in it. You're not remembering the times the would've should've could'ves you are honoring your brother's life. In the way that you're grieving. And I think that has everything to do with this message that I talk about in the book.
'cause your words were, there was nothing I could have done. that's it right there. it's the Serenity Prayer. What is in our control and what is not. Yeah. And itwas nothing in your control that you could have done.
So I'll start by reminding people of the Serenity prayer. the short version of it is God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Yeah. And if we really sit with that simple prayer, most of us have already heard, and that God can be our higher power, it can be nature, it can be whatever it is for the listener.
And we learned that to ask in every situation, what do I have control over and what I don't? And when we have guilt over something or a false narrative or a limiting belief over something that we had no control over,
Becca Powers: yes,
Chris Janssen: we are trying to control something that's not ours to control and that is plain God.
Yeah, and it is another form of pride in the step recovery programs, which I'm part of. We actually call that pride in reverse, where even if we have self-loathing or we're guilt or we're like, oh, woe is me having a big pity party, that's another form of pride as well. So when we, that's really
Becca Powers: interesting.
Chris Janssen: And it's natural to have guilt. Like, it's natural to have guilt, but then let's move out of it. Right. That's
Becca Powers: what I was just gonna say, it is just a lot of wisdom in what you're saying. so I wanna ask you another question on the Grace narrative and on the theme of your book too.
I think it's pretty much been part of our conversation, but I'll ask the question more directly. Like, how could using. This theme of what we're talking about, empower someone's life and change it for the better.
Chris Janssen: To just see through the lens of We don't get to control everything, even though we may want to, and that includes our self-worth.
Hmm. Yeah. You don't get to control how valuable you are. If you're human, you have value no matter what. I get it that that's hard for some of us to accept and so we do need to work on it like a muscle at the gym, right? Where we put on that narrative, put it on like a mantra or you know, I have lots of exercises in the book to condition these narratives.
We don't just hear it one time and now it's part of us. It took a long time to write that old, lousy story. It will take time to condition the new story. Yeah, I love that so
Becca Powers: much. And I think that, so many people want the easy button, which is why people sign up for programs that promise this in 30 days
True transformation takes time and it's another opportunity to enter grace You didn't get to where you were overnight, like I just love this topic so much. I'm so happy you came on the podcast because I've never spoken about Grace. It's one of the topics that hasn't. Really been up since you have a book.
It's just awesome. We get to like double click in it. I'm like, this is good. But it's just such a good reminder that grace is part of the process. You didn't get to where you are overnight. You didn't build your isms or whatever, in 30 days you're not gonna be able to shift in 30 days.
But you can shift your mindset in 30 days. You can shift. Your mindset in to, this is a journey I wanna be committed to. This is a practice I wanna be committed to. And then like you said, you get to. Use tools like you present in your book to help someone with that reconditioning And reprogramming process.
Chris Janssen: Yes. Yes. Knowing it's not perfect. It's progress, not perfection.
Becca Powers: Yeah. That's awesome. Is and I don't mean to put you on the spot, but I'm like, is there a tool or a tip in the book that would be easy to share with the listeners?
Chris Janssen: Yeah. I think my favorite one, the main one could, because we're talking about story, the tip would be to write down.
Whatever your story as you hear it now is like, and be very honest and, take a piece of paper, put two columns, line down the middle on the left side. Write down the story as you hear it. Like let's say if you weren't who you are, another person who lost a sibling and was stuck in that. Place we don't wanna be stuck in.
Maybe they would say, my brother drowned. It's my fault. things like this always happen to me. I should have, been over there. I should have whatever it is. And you write it down. Then you, highlight only what's true, which really, in what I just said, the only thing that's true is my brother drown.
So then you go over to the right side of the paper and write the truths, and then even if you don't want to, you attach a new meaning to it. So it's like a new story. Yes, my brother drowned. His life was beautiful while, you the time he had here was beautiful. whatever it is, you're gonna have a new meaning.
Even if you don't believe it yet, you're gonna write the new story and it's gonna help to have a coach or someone walk you through this or a friend To say, okay, write it down even if you don't believe it. And then that's the part we condition. We condition. I love that acting as if and stepping into that new belief and really letting that old story go.
And there's examples in the book of, little tricks you can do to let the old story go. Some people put rocks or something very heavy in a backpack. Then recite the old story and then set the backpack down and recite the new story because it just Ooh, that
Becca Powers: Yeah. Brings the physiology into it.
Yeah.
Chris Janssen: Getting it into your nervous system and physiology is really key. So, that's one thing that would be like whatever story we attach to the facts in our life, become our beliefs. Yeah, and we've lived for many, many beliefs for a very long time that we aren't aware how they got there.
But if we sit and think about them, we can reconstruct them in condition, the beliefs that we want.
Becca Powers: Such powerful work. It's such powerful work. And talk about, grace and freedom and liberation. Those are the words that are coming to me. You start to shift that narrative and you free yourself.
Chris Janssen: Hmm.
Becca Powers: you're an author and a coach and you're presenting the information to help people, I am too. But it's, you get to this state by doing the work yourself.
Chris Janssen: Yeah,
Becca Powers: for sure. You know, people are like, I
Chris Janssen: don't need do it. I'm like, I, I didn't learn that in a textbook. That's right.
Becca Powers: I might have sharpened my skills with training, but I actually had to do the work myself. Uhhuh. Yeah. But as you're saying all that, what's coming up for me is my personal journey, and I'm like, oh my God. Likewhen I take a deep breath, I mean, I still have, you know, I'm human, I still have heaviness and things that I'm working through.
I can take a deep breath now and be like, ah, you know, and that's, a gift. And I love that you have built just the invitation and Grace yourself I think is so welcoming. To someone who might not, like, maybe you pick up someone who's done some self work, maybe someone who's done some self work picks up your book, but maybe somebody picks it up for the first time.
Like, oh, that would be really nice for, I feel like it's A really warm invitation. What, caused you to title it that?
Chris Janssen: Mm. so many years of bracing myself like, I gotta do this. like at a white knuckle it or willpower my way to get rid of this addiction, or whatever it is.
And then instead of that bracing myself, I need to grace myself and accept the stop set down where I'm powerless. Like admit, for me it was alcohol. Like yes, I have. A lot of discipline and willpower, and that's not a bad thing, but in that one area, I had none. So I thought I was a monster because of that.
Instead of seeing, no, it's because it's an addictive substance and you got caught in its trap. This isn't a moral issue, and so I really needed to shift my belief. To, to grace instead of grace.
Becca Powers: I love that. See, I love finding out, like the backstory, the things the conversation is flying by and I knew it.
Would, we have about five minutes left. What where would you like to take the listener? What would you like to share
Chris Janssen: in closing up? Hmm. Yeah, just sit with this, go back and listen to the old story news story exercise that I presented, and if they are, it is written down in both my books, so somebody can, it walks you straight through all of it, but.
See anything through the lens of that, what story am I attaching to this circumstance in my life, especially those circumstances we don't have control over. that's a good message to leave people with. And then the. book is available where books are sold and, I keep my website updated?
Whatever's going on, my coaching services are there too. That's chris janssen coaching.com. That's awesome. And so, yeah.
Becca Powers: That's so cool. And do you see yourself writing a third or are you just still on. Pause.
Chris Janssen: I started a third. It's
ah, I knew it. I'm like, every
Becca Powers: writer people ask me too, they're like, we have to write you your third.
Yeah. I'm like, I have some concepts in my head, but yeah,
Chris Janssen: I'm not fully in. I think once I get fully in, I just take a big break from everything and, and do, I'm more, I'm more right in seasons, like not so much. An hour a day or just like, block everything for three months and just crank it out or something.
But
Becca Powers: I love that. I love the creative process. That's a whole nother,
Chris Janssen: I
Becca Powers: think I could
Chris Janssen: have
Becca Powers: you on just, oh, I know. The creative process and it's different for everybody too. It is. That's why I love talking about it. I'm like, what do you do?
Chris Janssen: Yeah, I know. How do you do it? Right, Yeah. I definitely see I need to keep writing.
it's very healing for me. I mean,
Becca Powers: it's so healing for me too. Yeah.
Chris Janssen: Beautiful. You get it. It's like how much did you learn about yourself because you were writing
Becca Powers: tons,
Chris Janssen: right? I think I want people to know we're not writing because we think we know stuff that we have to share with other people.
It's, cooperative. we're all showing up and growing together, and if I'm letting people see what I'm writing, you're just. Getting a glimpse of how that looks.
Becca Powers: Very true. So, well, it's time to wind down, so I'm gonna ask the last question lit. It is the empowered half hour.
So I would love you to leave the listeners with a message of empowerment
Chris Janssen: You are worthy no matter what. There's nothing, anyone, or even yourself can say. Or do or think to negate your worth, period.
Becca Powers: staying in silence for that too. 'cause I received it. I got the goosebumps. I'm like, yes, Chris.
Yes. That is so good. All right, listeners, support Chris with her beautiful work. Obviously her message is so inspiring and I really do feel I. That if you picked up her book, you might experience some gracing shifts in your own life and how awesome would that be? So you can find Grace yourself wherever books are sold.
her website and everything will be in show notes as always. And Chris, thank you for being a guest on the Empowered Half Hour is great to have you.
Chris Janssen: Thank you so much, Becca.
