The emPOWERed Half Hour

Mental Health, Sobriety, and Self-Worth with Instagram & TikTok Influencer, Bill Cornhoff

• Becca Powers • Season 1 • Episode 89

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What does it take to rise when life has knocked you down in every possible way?

In this raw and deeply powerful episode of The EmPOWERed Half Hour, Becca Powers sits down with Bill Cornhoff for a vulnerable conversation about mental health, sobriety, workplace trauma, and finding the strength to begin again.


Key Moments You Won't Want to Miss:

  • Bill’s candid story of hitting rock bottom and finally finding hope through medication.
  • Becca’s vulnerable share of her own emotional collapse at work, and the awakening it sparked.
  • A heartfelt discussion on workplace trauma, burnout, and the human cost of corporate disconnection.


About Bill
William Cornhoff is a founding member of the Britney Army, a card-carrying member of the BeyHive, and—after a bar fight in Tijuana—an honorary member of the Southern California chapter of the Hells Angels. Raised in Cleveland, Ohio, he attended a private Catholic high school, an experience that came with its own challenges as a gay man. He went on to earn his bachelor’s degree from the University of Toledo and a master’s degree from the University of Miami. He spent 20 years in South Florida, where he built a successful career and shared his life with someone he deeply loved. In 2022, his world turned upside down when he relocated to Texas and faced unemployment, the loss of his partner, and struggles with addiction. Today, he is genuinely happy and embracing his comeback story.


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Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies

Becca Powers: Welcome to another episode of the Empowered Half Hour, and today I have one of my former colleagues and friends, bill Korn Hoff with us. So Bill, say hi to everybody. 

Bill Cornhoff: Hello everybody. 

Becca Powers: And Bill and I worked together probably like 10 years ago, so it was, it was a while and we both have had, life unfold for us in ways probably very unexpectedly since we last got a chance to really catch up.

 But Bill is now an Instagram and TikTok influencer on the topics of depression, shame, and sobriety. and just a short few months, maybe up to a year, he's gained a following, in the thousands. So at the end of this, I'm gonna give you guys his handles, so you can follow him as well. But Bill, I would love to hear more from you of like.

Why did you start building a platform? Like why this, passion around shame, depression, sobriety, mental health. I wanna hear how you rose into wanting to share. 

Bill Cornhoff: I grew up, in a loving family in SEO in Ohio. I was a Catholic school kid. I had a twin brother.

We had Sunday dinners at grandma. It was very normal growing up, but. Under that kinda normal and Rockwell painting, there was, a different struggle going on and I was bullied, relentlessly bullied, teased for weight, which developed into bulimia and I never really unpacked that and then, or dealt with that, I should say, when I was younger.

And then as adulthood brought success, it also brought a lot of loss. Mm-hmm. Um, I moved to Florida, I fell in love. had a house, had a big career, but, you know, life had other plans for me, I guess. And, the career derailed, mental health issues crept in. my boyfriend died, addiction crept in and just everything just opened up with the grief, like mentally, spiritually, physically.

 it just broke me and I found myself at one point, you know, just suicidal and, the relapse was also a part of my story there within that too. And so for me it was, clawing my way back out of that. It was not easy. It was very lonely and I really don't want anyone else to ever feel like that.

And that's my main driver for kind of, you know, sharing and. I like to do it with a little grit, a little humor and a soft heart and a little 

Becca Powers: stats. I've seen you, 

Bill Cornhoff: that would be it. 

Becca Powers: That's cool. So, well, let's go back to where you opened the con conversation. 'cause I didn't know this about you and, I think a lot of people can relate to.

Maybe a lot of our deep rooted issues really did start in childhood, and we don't have to unpack the entire childhood, but as it relates to mental health, the bullying led to bulimia. And so, you know, I know that in my audience of listeners I've had people struggle with eating disorders.

So, maybe just talk a little bit about like that through line of maybe how that. Continued into some of the deeper spins that happened for you? 

Bill Cornhoff: I think what happened, what happened, the big drive or thing from that was, you know, I had no self-worth and I mean, I had no self-worth to the point where I believed in God, but I just didn't think God cared about me, 

And especially when I started to lose everything. Yeah. And when you have no self worth. You let the wrong people in your life and or you're vulnerable at that point to let the wrong people in. And somehow these people find you and you start making bad decisions. And, you don't really learn how to take care of yourself or love yourself.

And I think that was a big kind of driver of where my addiction really manifested itself from. 

Becca Powers: Yeah, I get that. And I have my own addictions, like in my family, I have a lot of alcoholism and I've mentioned that to you. And then the audience has heard me talk about my brother a lot, which unfortunately I lost, sorry, to a drowning incident over a year ago.

And, it's really painful. So when you talk about like losing your boyfriend, that,like, that level of grieving when you've lost something that almost feels like the, I mean, I know you have a twin and like you get the sibling thing, but whether it's a sibling or a lover, completely different lost profile.

But when you're close with someone like that, it's like another part of you, you know? So 

Bill Cornhoff: it leaves a hole. I cannot prepare anyone for the pain of losing someone you're in love with. It is totally different. 

Becca Powers: Yeah. And I'm 

Bill Cornhoff: not saying it's worse. It's just different. Yeah. Different. Yes. It was like waking up with terminal cancer and being stabbed in the stomach every morning for like a while.

Sounds like 

Becca Powers: what my sister-in-law would say about losing my brother. 

Bill Cornhoff: Yeah. It was that. the grieving process was hard. The only thing I could say about it is that there's no right or wrong way to grieve and in the same flip side, so take as much time as you need. And there's no, right or wrong way though to support somebody who's grieving.

So if people aren't showing up for you the way you expect them to, it doesn't mean they don't love you. 

Becca Powers: Yeah, I 

Bill Cornhoff: think like the biggest thing I learned from that was, those who love us will miss us. So, Shit. Sorry. 

Becca Powers: No, I, I knew I cry when I talk, but, 

Bill Cornhoff: uh, those who love us will miss us. So, treasure the time you have with somebody and, you know, be kind to each other.

Becca Powers: I get that a lot. I mean, I think, I look back at my time with my brother and I don't regret anything. I just wish I had more. that's how I look at it. very grateful though, I'm sure. you see signs from your lover knowing that he's around. I get signs from my brother, yeah. All the time.

 the dragonfly is a really big one for me. as soon as he passes dragonfly everywhere at my house, my sister-in-law's house, like they were just everywhere, and they continue to be so. It's kind of cool when you run into something like that. Have you ran into any like specific signs? 

Bill Cornhoff: I see him like when the sun hits the clouds for some reason.

That's typically when I see him. 

Becca Powers: That's awesome. 

Bill Cornhoff: Yeah, and I swear, I mean people, he would call me weird hippie for this, but I swear I'm not being one. Like I swear the minute he passed away I felt it because I literally called my mom five minutes after and said, I thought, I think he died. And I was just like a mess.

 I do believe in kind of like that spirits or there's some kind of higher connection, I guess I'll say. 

Becca Powers: Yeah, there is you and I like talking about that and I didn't mean to invoke the tears. I know they're there. but I think it's really important for people to, to have hope. And that's kind of part of your message, 

like to think that these, to think that. There's no connection on the other side is a very lonely place for us that are still here and mourning that loss. So I look very forward to seeing signs. I don't care if people think I'm crazy, I'm like, oh, don't give fuck. It makes me feel good.

Bill Cornhoff: You know, connection is so important why we're here I believe it's strong enough to exist. Why we're gone too. And yeah, 

Becca Powers: I do believe 

Bill Cornhoff: that, you know, connection is really the opposite of sobriety. It's honestly, being connected to people is what keeps you sober. 

Becca Powers: I, so I 

Bill Cornhoff: do believe it's a higher, there's a big power.

More of a power to it than we realize. 

Becca Powers: I do, I do agree with that. so I wanna talk a little bit, because you talked about self-worth and when I was at my lowest point, I would say self-worth was the root of my problem too. Like, my addiction was work. I worked, worked, worked, worked, worked, worked, worked to the point that I made it my first priority, 

Yeah. And here I have four kids, a husband myself, like I was at the bottom of the priority list 'cause I was so busy making sure that low self-worth that I had was filled by validation and approval and yeah, accolades. Right? and so it was a tough road to. Shift all that perspective within myself to start loving myself, to start giving my permission, myself permission to slow down.

 there's something in a lot of the pre-talk that we were doing, and even in your introduction that is, where I'm going to take this conversation. And a lot of it was rooted in shame because I was shameful of who at the core. Of who I was and what a awful thing to think about yourself, because we're all beautiful souls, 

 and so I'd love for you, I know you get really passionate when you talk about shame. I'd love for you to share kind of like what are some lessons you've learned about shame and what would you wish listeners knew about you? I know that 

Bill Cornhoff: like, the most recent would be like getting help for your mental health because 

When I was like suicidal, which I, I mean, I hate to admit, but I was, I, knew something was off. I knew I hit a low that I had never seen before, and I knew it, and I didn't know how to get out of it. It was very dark. I feel like to me, that's what hell is. I really feel like I went there and back, 

 the minute and I didn't want one more thing wrong with me. You know, I was associating, I didn't want one more fucking Sergeant Parker. 

Becca Powers: No, you, you curse on here, so it's fine. One more fucking thing 

Bill Cornhoff: wrong with me. 

Becca Powers: Yeah. Say it like that. 

Bill Cornhoff: I just did it. I was like, how much do I have to, I have to be like this grieving, fucking grieving my boyfriend.

I like Dick. She's like, I don't want any more problems. And I already had depression, anxiety. Well, I had bipolar disorder and I had a lot of shame. I knew the diagnosis was coming, like I knew it for like a year, but I didn't wanna deal with it. So, I dunno if anyone's ever tried to get sober. unmedicated while diagnosed bipolar, but it's not that easy.

Yeah. Um, especially because you're dealing with things like character defects and whatnot that you gotta kind of acknowledge and overcome so that, feedback loop's difficult, once I started getting my medication, it was like, I could, I was not drowning in depression anymore.

I had my arm floating. You could take me anywhere. I was good to go. So I would just treat that if you're no, you, you feel like something's off, just go get it checked out like a cold. Getting your mental health taken care of should be no bigger deal than going to the doctor for a cold.

It should honestly be the same, and we need to stop. Shaming people around that and talk more about it, in my opinion. 

Becca Powers: I agree. And for me, I have, probably not surprising to anybody who knows me, but I have a DHD and I went Un yeah. So weird, right? No. Um, but I went unmedicated for years and, but I was wondering 

 know, when you have a DHD, you have a lot of highs and lows. So not necessarily like bipolar and being manic, but there's a lot there. Is that like high low, there is se manic behavior. There's a lot of anxiety. ' cause anxiety and a DH ADHD are sisters. if I'm having a big A DHD moment, typically my anxiety can be crippling.

 Yeah. So that's on my extreme sides. I have crippling anxiety or had, watch my words because I've been using stuff. But what I like about what you're saying is that even for someone like me, I'm a hippie. I'm a naturalist. I don't like to put medicine in my body, but guess what? I fucking needed it.

 and when I finally got off that. Narrative in my head, kind of what you're talking about, that I was like, oh, there's a shame in taking medicine. I should be able to control myself. I should be able to take some supplements and figure this shit out. when that doesn't work, what do you do?

You know, you're not supposed like, don't torture yourself. 

Bill Cornhoff: Yeah. 

Becca Powers: Go get some help. And so I remember the first time I booked an appointment with the psychiatrist, I had cried because I was like. I'm not crazy or maybe I am crazy, like, you know, like that whole narrative going, I'm not crazy. That whole narrative's going on in my head.

But once I got my medication I was like, oh dear God, thank you. 

Bill Cornhoff: I always, always felt like it was like honestly getting my arm floaties because I just was so drowning and I just remember like, oh, I'm good to go now. Like it was just then 

Becca Powers: it gives you the energy to tackle because, bipolar often is a.

 indication of severe trauma. A DHD crippling anxiety, byproduct of trauma. So when you are, when in an episode and you can't even regulate yourself because you're like out in crazy town. So if you're ready to tackle your healing, get on your meds.

You know, and give yourself a fighting chance to do the work. 

Bill Cornhoff: I think 

Becca Powers: that's my opinion. 

Bill Cornhoff: Oh, no, I agree. My biggest driver for not getting medication too, when it came to bipolar disorder, I shouldn't say my biggest, one of the was I didn't wanna gain weight because the whole, and that kind of goes back to the whole bulimia thing.

Yes. 

Becca Powers: And see how that cycle, that's what I was like, let's unpack all of this because it was 

Bill Cornhoff: like, Jesus, and that's just kind of like, that's just sad. You know what I mean? I don't mean that in a belittling kind of way to anyone that feels the same or struggling. I mean it like. It's sad that I couldn't get help because I was afraid I'd get fat.

Yeah. Like, that's so stupid on my part. You know what I mean? So, but it did, it was a big, I just remembered ignoring it, and that was one of the big drivers. 

Becca Powers: So what type like words of encouragement or something might you have for a listener that might be struggling either with their mental health or sobriety, or maybe they don't have either, but they're stuck in their shame cycles and they just can't get out, like what would, what would you wanna say to them?

Bill Cornhoff: I guess for me, what I would say to them is, you need to move. And I don't mean like, I mean physically move. If you're stuck in your bed, just get out and get into the living room and if you can go for a walk, go for a walk. If you could get to a meeting, get to a meeting, and if you can, get to therapy.

Get to therapy. I know for myself, it was a two punch, not two punch. That didn't make sense. But I couldn't do well without the other. I couldn't not, and not be, you know, going to meetings. Like I had to be in recovery and I had to be in therapy and it doesn't work for me, one without the other.

 and I always feel like, you know, if I could do it, you could do it. I mean, I lost, I lost everything in a short amount of time. I mean, within a six months window, my life went from having, being in love, living in this beautiful house. I remodeled that. I spent six years remodeling, having this big career, my two dogs, and then all of a sudden the dogs were dead.

My boyfriend was dead, the house was gone. And I'm in an apartment in Texas, alone and unemployed. And you know, through all this, and then I'm having to go to rehab and I'm having to go to therapy and my friends are 20,000 miles away or however hell far it's, and if I can do it, you could do it. I guess that would be a big thing.

Yeah. 

Becca Powers: I get the goosebumps as you say that because I think that we try it. I say we try, but I'm gonna use the eye. Like I remember trying so hard to hold it all together where really what I needed to do was just let it fall apart. Yeah. And so that way I could rebuild myself Yeah.

The right way. and not like the ones right or wrong, but I would say in a healthy way. In a way that was self-honoring, respected, self valuing. Like I look back, at our former employer and, it was a very narcissistic environment and I didn't know that I was under narcissism and I fell for it, and it ended up shrinking.

Well, I allowed myself to shrink. In that environment. And my dad also passed away when I was there. And, because I was trying so hard to prove my value, prove my worth, deal with a loss, I lost myself. And, not many people know this that worked with me at the time. But, shortly, before my resignation, 

Resignation. fell to the bathroom floor in an emotional, like I had an emotional collapse. I just was looking at myself in the mirror and I was like, I don't even know who I am anymore. Like, I didn't recognize the woman, the leader, the mom, the wife. And I was just like, who the fuck have I become?

And just that weight. that gravity of that thought, my knees buckled and I ended up on the floor. Right.

Bill Cornhoff: when I was there, I mean I got, I went through something very traumatic and, right around COVID and. I got PTSD from it. And on all levels of leadership, was awareness of what was going on with me and they wrote me off and I got bullied by the president and vice president, relentlessly.

And while it was clearly up, you know when you're out, you know what I mean? Yeah. You know when you're out. Trust me. Yeah. it was like overnight. One minute they asked me to work escalations, which I did all like to like, I was there seven days a week through Christmas, practically in like 2021.

And then I came in one day and I was out and I had no idea what was happening. they knew I was in a middle of a mental health crisis though, and they knew that I had, I disclosed that I had had PTSD. And it just was, they used it as a way to get rid of me. They decided that they weren't gonna help me.

We didn't need to unpack this, you know, that was it. And it made things a lot worse. 

Becca Powers: Yeah. And they 

didn't have to do that, you know what I mean? They didn't have to. There's other ways I'm saying you don't have to keep me employed, you know, but Right. gimme a severance on me on my way, but, yeah.

And do it with love. Do it with care. Treat you like a human being, you know? 

Bill Cornhoff: Yeah. It was, they used it against me and they broke me even more. I just, watching it happen, I just could not believe it was happening. 

Becca Powers: Yeah. And I'm so sorry that happened to you, but I think it's an important conversation that we both share.

Because when you take pride and when you're careered, I mean, A, when you take pride in your career, but B, when you're careered, I mean, I was a senior leader, you were even more senior. You know, I was a senior manager, you're director, we're not like babies in our career, you know? Yeah. And I what I mean, and so when you go through some type of workplace trauma, when you're.

Seasoned in your career. It's devastating. 

Bill Cornhoff: Yes. I think both of us too, at one point were like the golden child, but like the one to watch like, you know, seven years, it wasn't like, you know, and 

Becca Powers: I a short, yeah. Yeah. 

Bill Cornhoff: So it was just, you know, it was just, I have a hard time when I see corporations put videos on saying that we're like a family here because you know, they did that during orientation and I can tell you that my family rose up for me even though they did not.

You know what I mean? Right. So like that to me. it was difficult too because there was nurse burnout during, this was all during COVID and we were doing a lot about mental health and mental health support for nurses. I'm literally writing the messaging for the organization on how we protect mental health and our nurses and.

Meanwhile, I'm struggling getting the shit kicked out of me. Like it just didn't make sense. You know what I mean? Yeah. It was so weird. It was so weird. 

Becca Powers: Yeah, I get that. But you know, like whether you wanna call it God universe is, has a way of illuminating what. We really are working on. So I hear you say that and I was like, well Bill, you were meant to help people with mental health because even though you had to go through this shit storm that you've gone through, like if you look back and you click that moment in time, right?

You just clock it. You were already on the narrative that is like near and dear to your heart. Unfortunately, you had to go through a. 

Bill Cornhoff: A lot, 

Becca Powers: a lot. I'm like, I don't know the right words for that. I'm just gonna use my hands. 

Bill Cornhoff: Like, during, like yeah, especially like, I, my driver back then when I was, I was working, I would say a lot.

I was 60, 70 hours a week and was, I loved our nurses I knew the mental distress they were in. I just knew it and just from talking to them too. and I had a lot of honor for what they were doing. So. I think you're right. I think there was probably something back there that kind of clicked.

Becca Powers: Yeah. And so like now, like for me, how my work, I've gone through so many different versions of what I'm calling myself and what I love to do, but what I've kind of landed on, and I've done a ton of certifications and stuff, but I'm doing trauma informed leadership. That's what I am putting my, like I love it, flag in the sand.

And I now, certify leaders how to be coaches. So that way they can have  a different approach with their employees. That's more, mental health centric. That's more,  gives the employee more self-agency, more self-confidence. So I'm very passionate about what I do because of what I've been through, 

Yeah. So sometimes we have to go through it so we can rise up and serve. And it's not fair, like at this point, I am the lone survivor of my family. My mom's passed, my dad's passed, my brother's passed. and so I look at life differently than most people. because I'm like, I got, and I don't know if you feel like this about your boyfriend, but in the work that you're doing.

But I look at it like their legacy lives through me. If I stop sharing the message, if I stop helping. The world the way I feel like I can. Then it's all for naught Yeah. So I don't know how you feel about that, but 

Bill Cornhoff: I feel the same. I feel like something good has to come out of all this something.

Yes. And I, and I don't mean good, just like, I mean, on a larger scale for some reason. Yes. That's like, um, I get the goosebumps when you say that something different. All this loss has to come, you know, and especially when it comes to him. 

Becca Powers: Yeah. That's like you, their legacy lives through us, and so our work becomes a little bit more important.

Bill Cornhoff: Yeah. 

Becca Powers: tear up saying this, but I'm really proud of you I love seeing your rise because you really have been through a lot. 

Bill Cornhoff: I got hit every aspect in life that life could fall apart. It fell apart like it really did. You're 

Becca Powers: like, it did. 

Bill Cornhoff: I remember thinking God hated me.

I remember thinking I was on a TV show in heaven called Punked, and they were just bored pranking me and just ripping my life apart. Like I couldn't figure out why this was happening to me and everyone else had this life. And then, you know, what I learned was that, God was just trying to get me to wake up and it took a lot of consequences to do so.

Becca Powers: Yeah, that's what I learned about 

Bill Cornhoff: myself too. And I had to stop blaming God. I had to stop blaming God and I had to start listening for God, not in the good, but also in the bad. 

Becca Powers: Yeah, I get that very much. 'cause I think like. I probably had quite a few signs that I ignored. I'm like, red flag, red flag. No, it's green.

It's fine. It's fine. so well, we're starting to wind down. So I wanted to ask, another question. So going back to the audience and them listening right now, and it's the empowered half hour. let's go ahead and, Share an empowering message with them. what do you want them to know? What do you want them to take away?

Like if their life has fallen apart or they're in, like some type of, workforce, workplace, not a good situation, like whatever it is, everything that we've talked about, you can share whatever you want, but let's give some wisdom to the audience. 

Bill Cornhoff: Let's do it. I know that hitting rock bottom is hard, But every time, I've done it twice, you know, I've found my way back and that's taught me that failure isn't fatal unless you give up. So please don't give up. another big thing I'd say would say self-reliance is essential, but so is asking for help. I was raised to be strong, but life beat the hell out of me.

And it took a lot of strength to reach out and crying at a meeting and texting someone at midnight and finally saying, I need help. that's a sign of strength. That's courage. 

Becca Powers: 

Bill Cornhoff: you're lovable even if you're healing, you know, shame you to run the show. now I believe, especially in my good days, that I'm worthy of love, even with scars even with mistakes.

 even when the healing isn't done yet.  your dog can read you better than most humans. That's a big thing I learned. She knew when I was off. and she reminds me that loyalty doesn't flinch. and I guess telling the truth, even the ugly kind is powerful.

 your willingness to say the messy, say the real stuff is your superpower. It is what's going to make you matter and save you. your story will save other people. And not by being perfect, but by being honest. 

Becca Powers: Yeah. I love that. That's so good. I am sure the audience would like to follow you, so share your handles.

How can the audience stay in contact with you? 

Bill Cornhoff: oh, shoot. I'm gonna have to look at it. I just forgot. I cannot believe that. 

Becca Powers: That's all right. It happens. I'm on. 

Bill Cornhoff: Oh, it's, oh, it's William. JC is my Instagram and, that the links to my TikTok is in there. 

Becca Powers: All right. That's awesome. Yeah, so you guys can reference the show notes.

We'll drop the Instagram and the TikTok link so you can follow Bill. what I really wanna say, bill, is just thank you for your vulnerability. I, know from my own work that my vulnerability is what heals others. And I am tearing as I say this, but I know this episode is gonna hit somebody.

Who needed to hear it. And so just thank you for coming in and being raw and real. 

Bill Cornhoff: Thank you for inviting me. it was great seeing you, and congratulations on everything you've done. Thank you. Thank you. 

Becca Powers: All right. I'll see you stay on, but I'm just waving. Bye.